Grey Divorce: What to Know If You're Over 50 and Considering Separation

Grey divorce is on the rise.

It might surprise you to learn that divorce rates are declining in most age groups... except for one. In Canada and beyond, there's a growing wave of people over 50 choosing to separate, a phenomenon known as grey divorce. Whether it's after decades of marriage or a second union that didn't go as planned, later-life divorce carries its own unique set of challenges and possibilities.

If you're in this season of life and considering separation, or already navigating it, this post is for you. Let’s explore why grey divorce is on the rise and what you need to consider, especially when it comes to your finances, your emotional well-being, and your future.

Why More People Over 50 Are Getting Divorced

We often think of divorce as something that happens early in marriage, but statistics show a growing trend among older adults. Some of the reasons are practical; others are deeply personal:

• We're living longer. Life expectancy is higher, and many people don’t want to spend another 20 or 30 years in a relationship that no longer brings connection or peace.

• Empty nests reveal cracks. Once children move out, couples sometimes discover they’ve grown apart.

• Cultural stigma has faded. Divorce is no longer seen as taboo, especially for women who now have more financial and social independence.

• Second marriages can be vulnerable. Later-in-life unions often involve blended families, financial complexities, and differing expectations.

The Emotional Landscape of Grey Divorce

Divorcing after 50 can bring a surprising mix of relief, sadness, guilt, and fear. You might grieve the loss of the shared history or feel disoriented about what comes next. Relationships with adult children can shift. Mutual friendships may fall away.

And yet, there can also be growth. Many people find this stage of life to be an invitation to rediscover themselves. You may have more emotional insight, life experience, and resilience than you realize. That doesn’t mean it’s easy. But it is navigable.

A former client of mine once shared that, after 35 years of marriage, she left not because of a single catastrophic event, but because "it was a slow fading." She found herself living like a roommate with her husband. Through mediation, they were able to part with dignity, preserving family ties and laying a foundation for healing. Her greatest fear had been loneliness. What she discovered instead was a new sense of self.

Financial Questions You Can't Ignore in Grey Divorce

This is often the biggest concern for clients over 50. And it makes sense. Whether you're still working or already retired, a divorce can dramatically change your financial outlook.

• What happens to pensions and retirement savings? In Ontario, these are part of the equalization process, and it's critical to understand how they're valued and divided.

• Will I have to sell the house? Property division is a complex conversation. Keeping the home may not always be the most financially sound option.

• How will this affect my CPP, OAS, or other benefits? Government pensions may be split or adjusted based on marital status and contribution histories.

• Am I financially prepared to live alone? Budgets, debt, spousal support, and insurance all become more central.

Mediation is often a wise approach in grey divorce, especially when emotions are high and futures are uncertain. It can help preserve more of your assets, avoid litigation costs, and foster clearer communication - all essential as you plan for retirement.

If You're Already Retired: What to Know

For those already living on a fixed income, divorce can feel especially daunting. Consider:

• Healthcare coverage and caregiving responsibilities

• Rewriting your will and updating powers of attorney

• Managing income from pensions, annuities, or government support

You may also want to work with a financial advisor who understands late-life transitions, or a mediator with experience in elder issues.

Hope After Grey Divorce: What Your Future Can Look Like

It may not feel like it now, but many people who go through grey divorce eventually describe it as a turning point, not just an ending. This chapter can bring:

• Renewed friendships

• Greater clarity in personal values

• The freedom to shape retirement on your own terms

• Emotional healing and even new love (when and if you're ready)

Let yourself imagine a future you want, even if you don't yet know how to get there. One step at a time is enough.

Next Steps

If you're facing a grey divorce, you don't have to figure everything out alone. Book a free consultation to learn how mediation can help you protect your finances, your peace of mind, and your future.